THIS BLOG HAS BEEN MOVED

Since I don’t have much time, I think I will stop writing this blog for the moment. Everyone can now follow my blog at http://celinejulie.blogspot.com
I may return to WordPress in the future if blogspot runs into a problem.

FAVORITE AUSTRALIAN MOVING IMAGES

FAV. AUSTRALIAN FILMS/MOVING IMAGES

in alphabetical order

1.AMELIA ROSE TOWERS (1992, Jackie Farkas)

2.AT THE ROTUNDA (2005, Peter Alwast)

3.AUSTRALIAN RULES (2002, Paul Goldman)

4.BABE (1995, Chris Noonan)

5.DOGWOMAN: DEAD DOG WALKING (2000, Rowan Woods)

6.EPSILON (1997, Rolf de Heer)

7.HUNT ANGELS (2006, Alec Morgan)

8.INNOCENCE (2000, Paul Cox)

9.IN THE WINTER DARK (1998, James Bogle)

10.KICKFLIPPER: FRAGMENTS EDIT (2000-2003, Shaun Gladwell)

11.KISS OR KILL (1997, Bill Bennett)

12.LINEAGE OF THE DIVINE (2002, Monika Tichacek)

13.LOVE (2003, Tracey Moffatt)

14.MUSPILLI (2004, Stefan Popescu)

15.A NOCTURNE (2007, Bill Mousoulis)

16.OTHER PEOPLE’S DREAMS OF ME (2003, James Lynch)

17.RADIANCE (1998, Rachel Perkins)

18.RETURN TO EDEN (1983, Karen Arthur + Kevin James Dobson)

19.TIME AND MOTION STUDY (2006, John Tonkin)

20.WOLF CREEK(2004, Greg McLean)

SALVADOR ALLENDE

SALVADOR ALLENDE (2004, Patricio Guzmán) is available online with English subtitles.
http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=7641386701194606949#

An interview with Patricio Guzmán by Michael Guillen
http://mubi.com/notebook/posts/2408

MINIMAL SUGGESTIONS

A friend asked me and other friends to recommend some minimal, social-concerned films. So here are my suggestions:

1.BREMEN FREEDOM (1972, Rainer Werner Fassbinder, West Germany)
สร้างจากเรื่องจริงของผู้หญิงที่ฆ่าคนตายไปเป็นจำนวนมาก โดยหนังทั้งเรื่องถ่ายทำโดยใช้ฉากโล่งๆเพียงหนึ่งฉาก

2.CALENDAR (1993, Atom Egoyan)

3.THE CORRIDOR (1994, Sharunas Bartas, Lithuania)
จิตวิญญาณเฉื่อยเนือย ซังกะตายของผู้คนในสังคม ถ่ายทอดผ่านทางตัวละครที่เดินกันไปมาในอพาร์ทเมนท์เกือบตลอดทั้งเรื่อง

4.DAMNATION (1988, Bela Tarr, Hungary)

5.DEAR DIARY (1994, Nanni Moretti, Italy)

6.DYING AT A HOSPITAL (1993, Jun Ichikawa, Japan)
หนังสะท้อนความเงียบเหงาของชีวิตวัยชรา ด้วยการเฝ้าสังเกตเหล่าบรรดาคนแก่ที่นอนป่วยอยู่ในโรงพยาบาลอย่างเงียบๆและห่างๆ

7.FATE (1994, Fred Kelemen, Germany)
หนุ่มสาวคู่หนึ่งใช้ชีวิตอย่างเหงาๆในคืนหนึ่ง พวกเขาทะเลาะกัน แต่ไม่ว่าพวกเขาจะเลิกกันหรือรักกัน โลกนี้มันก็โหดร้ายเหมือนเดิม

8.FREVEL (1984, Peter Fleischmann, West Germany)
ตำรวจคนหนึ่งตกหลุมรักฆาตกรสาวที่ฆ่าลูกของตัวเอง หนังถ่ายทอดบรรยากาศหลอนๆแนว HOTEL ของ Jessica Hausner ออกมาได้ดีมาก และดูจนจบแล้วเราก็ไม่มีทางเข้าใจอะไรในจิตใจของนางเอกได้เลย

9.THE KITE (2002, Alexei Muradov, Russia) อย่าจำสลับกับ THE KITE ของ Lebanon
ชีวิตเหงาๆเศร้าซึมของผู้ชายที่ทำงานเป็นพัศดีเรือนจำ ตลอดทั้งเรื่องแทบไม่มีเหตุการณ์อะไรเกิดขึ้น แต่ “บรรยากาศ” ในเรื่องมันเข้มข้นมาก

10.THE LEFT-HANDED WOMAN (1977, Peter Handke, West Germany)
หญิงสาวที่เลิกกับผัวโดยไม่มีสาเหตุ เลิกกับผัวเสร็จเธอก็นั่งดูหนังของโอสุแล้วเธอก็หลับหน้าจอทีวี

11.THE LIFE OF JESUS (1997, Bruno Dumont, France)

12.THE LONG DAY CLOSES (1992, Terence Davies, UK)

13.THE MATCH FACTORY GIRL (1989, Aki Kaurismäki)

14.NATHALIE GRANGER (1972, Marguerite Duras, France)
สองสาวใหญ่ใช้ชีวิตในบ้านเดียวกัน นักวิจารณ์บางคนนำหนังเรื่องนี้ไปเขียนวิจารณ์ผ่านกรอบการเมืองหลังเหตุการณ์จลาจลในฝรั่งเศสปี 1968 ออกมาได้ความยาวหลายหน้ามาก

15.RAIN DOGS (2006, Ho Yuhang, Malaysia)
พี่ชายพระเอกหล่อมาก

16.THE SKY, THE EARTH, AND THE RAIN (2008, José Luis Torres Leiva, Chile)
หญิงสาวที่เดิน เดิน เดิน หนังมีเนื้อเรื่องมากกว่านี้ แต่เราติดตาฉากเดินของเธอมาก
imdb ระบุว่า plot keyword ของหนังเรื่องนี้คือ Tarkovskyesque

15 SHORT DOCUMENTARIES

I was tagged by Filmsick and Taiki Sakpisit for 15 SHORTS AND DOCUMENTARY FILMS IN 15 MINUTES. But there are too many short films and documentary films I worship, so I think I should make a list of 15 short documentaries instead:

1.THE AUDIENCE (2005, Tossapol Boonsinsukh, 10 min)

2.BRUTALITY IN STONE (1961, Alexander Kluge + Peter Schamoni, West Germany)
http://www.ubu.com/film/kluge.html

3.LES DITES CARIATIDES (1984, Agnès Varda, France)
http://homepage.mac.com/Vanvdo/directors/varda/cinevardaphoto.htm

4.THE GROUND I STAND (2002, Sherman Ong, Singapore)

5.HOMEWORK (2006, Sawad Rattanabunnakit)
I’m not sure if this film is a documentary or a mockumetary.

6.IN A BLUR OF DESIRE (2007, Araya Rasdjarmrearnsook)
This is the details of IN A BLUR OF DESIRE from 100 Tonson Gallery’s website:

“Araya probes into another angel of death in the work “In a blur of desire” which exposes the condition of before death period in a slaughterhouse. How the death of one animal life affects others? All are reflected through the animals that are going to be carved in the provincial slaughterhouse.

“In a blur of desire” exhibition communicates to the audiences with Media Installation that will screen the video picture of pigs, cows and buffaloes that are waiting for its turn in a slaughterhouse. The exhibition reflects fear and qualm of their before death period which is horrendous than the death.”

7.MAGIC WATER (น้ำใต้ท้องเรือ) (2000, Panu Aree)

8.A MILLION THREADS (2007, Thu Thu Shein, Myanmar)
http://www.der.org/films/art-of-doc-editing.html
I like Chayanin Tiangpitayagorn’s article on Burmese films in Starpics Magazine very much.

9.THE…PROFICIENT (เออ…เอ็งเก่ง) (2008, Phumiphat Arayathanitkul, 26 min)

10.SEAPORT (เมืองสมุทร) (2006, Attapon Pamakho + Benya Poowarachnan, 22 min)

11.TEARS (2003, Patana Chirawong, 13 min)

12.TO INFINITY AND BEYOND (2004, Sompot Chidgasornpongse, 10 min)

13.VELIKIJ VAM PRIVIT (2007, Peter Krupa, Slovakia)

14.WAY (ระยะทาง) (2009, Shutima Jaikong)
I’m not sure if this film is a documentary or a mockumetary.

15.THE X-FREE (2000, Wasanta Samrong, 5 min)

FAVORITE FILMS PRESENTING POEMS/POETS

Fav. films presenting poems/poets:

in alphabetical order:

1.THE ASSASSINATED SUN (2003, Abdelkrim Bahloul)

2.BROKEN GLASS (2002, Marte Maren Holth)
http://www.marteholth.com/broken-glass

3.THE BURDENED ASS (2002, Adrian Hedgecock)
http://vimeo.com/11786852

4.THE BUTTERFLY EFFECT (2009, Wiwat Lertwiwatwongsa)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fPHUf6nS5wQ

5.CHUTIMA (2007, Ratchapoom Boonbunchachoke)

6.FOR YOU (2000, Heidi Kocevar)

7.FUENG (2010, Teerani Siangsanoh, Wachara Kanha, Tani Thitiprawat)

8.GOTHIC (1986, Ken Russell)

9.HIGH KUKUS (1973, James Broughton)
http://www.tudou.com/programs/view/P8ZYtjDDfw0/
I think the monologue in this film is like a poem.

10.IN HER SHOES (2005, Curtis Hanson)

11.THE LAST TIME I COMMITTED SUICIDE (1996,Stephen Kay)

12.MILLION DOLLAR BABY (2004, Clint Eastwood)

13.MRS. PARKER AND THE VICIOUS CIRCLE (1994, Alan Rudolph)

14.RESISTANT POEM (2009, Prap Boonpan)

15.THE SIX PRINCIPLES (2010, Abhichon Rattanabhayon)
http://vimeo.com/14731445

16.SOPHIE’S CHOICE (1982, Alan J Pakula)

17.SWANN (1996, Anna Benson Gyles)

18.SYLVIA (2003, Christine Jeffs)

19.TOM & VIV (1994, Brian Gilbert)

20.UNTITLED VIDEO ON LYNNE STEWART AND HER CONVICTION,THE LAW,AND POETRY (2006,Paul Chan)

THIS CEMETERY IS FOR THE LIVING (1982, Supan Buranapim)

This is the opening title of THIS CEMETERY IS FOR THE LIVING (1982, Supan Buranapim)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RQ7nug_B-po

THE DAME WHO WAS APPOINTED BY HER OWN SERVANTS

THE DAME WHO WAS APPOINTED BY HER OWN SERVANTS (1993, Dao Ruang Team, A++++++++++)

This is the opening title of this TV series
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bcmdKQfpdAU

The performance of Sununta Worayos in this TV series gives a new meaning to the words “paranormal activity”. My friend said that this TV series is “something many people have never seen, never heard, or never dared to think that this kind of phenomenon can really happen in real life.” I totally agree with him. This may be the worst TV series of all time, but that’s why I love it.

15 SONG LYRICS

The Rules: Don’t take too long to think about it. Fifteen Singers-Songwriters who’ve influenced you and that will ALWAYS STICK WITH YOU. List the first fifteen you can recall in no more than fifteen minutes. Tag fifteen friends, including me, because I’m interested in seeing what artists my friends choose. (To do this, go to your Notes tab on your profile page, paste rules in a new note, cast your fifteen picks, and tag people in the note.)

I was tagged for 15 SINGERS-SONGWRITERS by Theepisit Frame Mahaneeranon and Filmsick.

Since I barely have any knowledge about singers-songwriters. So I decided not to make a list of 15 SINGERS-SONGWRITERS, but make a list of 15 SONG LYRICS instead.

1.PLEARNG PAI
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GsUzlbTjOB0

2.COPERNICUS – Basia
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qIZc9FRUFo8

3.COULD THIS BE LOVE – Seduction
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=znP7ozfJK5o

4.HE’S MY BOY – Mandy
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OHuikUqSEJ4

5.IF YOU WERE THE WOMAN AND I WAS THE MAN – Cowboy Junkies
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Suk2_wietjA

6.I’M STILL WAITING – Diana Ross
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R1iAtoX9DKk

7.I TALK TO THE WIND – Opus III
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LN1TX0Eobig

8.LICENSE TO KILL – Gladys Knight
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=txf3A8-QAaw

9.PING PONG – Stereolab
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3_XswHm514w

10.SHE WOULD DIE FOR LOVE – Julee Cruise

11.TOO GOOD – Banderas
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KACIYqtabg8

12.VANESSA’S FATHER – Lauren Christy

13.THE WAITRESS – Tori Amos
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vX_ZsshwyHY

14.WE DIDN’T START THE FIRE – Billy Joel
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eFTLKWw542g&ob=av2e

15.YOU COME FROM EARTH – Lena Fiagbe

เพลิงพ่าย

เจ็บช้ำ ระกำดวงใจแหลกลาญ
ตอกย้ำ ซ้ำเติมให้ตรมขมขื่น
ด้วยรัก รักแท้ทนกล้ำกลืน
ฝืนทน จนใจแหลกสลาย

บาปกรรมซ้ำซ้อน รักร้อนรุนแรงดังไฟ
แลบเลียโลมไล้ เร่าร้อนทุรนทุราย
โหดร้าย พิษรักทำคร่ำครวญเพ้อพร่ำ
เจ็บช้ำ จำทนอยู่อย่างนี้
รับกรรมให้พอ ตัวก่อไว้เอง

สุดเก็บสุดกด เพลิงไหม้ลามเผาทรวง
ทั้งรักทั้งหวง จึงต้องลวงทำลาย
แย่งเขามาครอง สนอง…ใจ (มันร้องว่าอะไรน่ะ ใครฟังออกช่วยบอกที)
ใครเป็นตายไม่สน
อุตส่าห์บากบั่น ยอมล่อล่วงเล่ห์กล
เพราะรักท่วมท้น ตามืดมนทำไป
ไม่คิดมาก่อน จะย้อนทำลาย โหดร้าย เจ็บปวด ทรมาน

เหลือเพียงใจที่แหลกลาญ ละลาย เพลิงพ่าย ร้อนแรง

(จริงๆแล้วชอบเพลงไตเติลละครเรื่องนาคี (1986) ที่นำแสดงโดยกาญจนา จินดาวัฒน์ และกำกับโดยส.อาสนจินดาด้วย รู้สึกว่าเพลงไตเติลจะเป็นการบรรยายถึงความรู้สึกของนางเอกที่ถูกชาวบ้านในหมู่บ้านกลั่นแกล้ง และนางเอกจะร้องย้ำๆว่า “ตามไปฆ่ามัน” “ตามไปฆ่ามัน” แต่พอดีตอนนี้หาเพลงนาคีไม่เจอ ถ้าใครเจอก็ช่วยบอกด้วยนะครับ)

COPERNICUS
This is a song about the place I come from
It’s not on the moon at all
Where people’s hearts are filled with passion
I miss it so, ’cause I’m here chasing love
In my land of great romantics
I’m the biggest dreamer of them all

No way to stop their desire to change
And to improve our world
One invented Esperanto
Ready to move and to try something new
I’m convinced that Chopin too
Would dig samba if he had a chance to groove

Though it’s true
That I only know very few simple words of your language
I’ve cracked it I’ve decided
Because the only words we need to communicate
Are the ones that can help me say
“I do love you”
And that make me understand you love me too

Our love will take this globe by storm
If it’s London, Warsaw or New York
‘Cause all around the world
People want to love and be loved
Open your eyes
There’s so much we don’t know
We don’t even realise
So you might get a better picture
And if I say, that on this planet today
We all have the same hearts,
I don’t claim I’m Curie or Copernicus
Nasza miloscia podbijemy glob
Londyn, Warszawe albo Nowy Jork
Sporjz tylko wsyscy w krag
Chca byc kochani i kochac chca

I TALK TO THE WIND

The wind cannot hear
(the wind cannot hear)
The wind cannot hear
The wind cannot hear
Said the straight man
To the late man
Where have you been
I’ve been here and
I’ve been there and
I’ve been inbetween
I talk to the wind
My words are all carried away
The wind cannot hear
(the wind cannot hear)
The wind cannot hear
I’m on the outside
Looking inside
What do i see
Much confusion
Disillusion
All around me
I talk to the wind
My words are all carried away
The wind cannot hear
(the wind cannot hear)
The wind cannot hear
The wind cannot hear (repeat)
You don’t possess me
Don’t impress me
Just upset my mind
Can’t instruct me
Or conduct me
Just use up my time
I talk to the wind
My words are all carried away
The wind cannot hear
(the wind cannot hear)
The wind cannot hear
The wind cannot hear (repeat and fade)

PING PONG

it’s alright ’cause the historical pattern has shown
how the economical cycle tends to revolve
in a round of decades three stages stand out in a loop
a slump and war then peel back to square one and back for more
bigger slump and bigger wars and a smaller recovery
huger slump and greater wars and a shallower recovery
you see the recovery always comes ’round again
there’s nothing to worry for things will look after themselves
it’s alright recovery always comes ’round again
there’s nothing to worry if things can only get better
there’s only millions that lose their jobs and homes and sometimes accents
there’s only millions that die in their bloody wars, it’s alright
it’s only their lives and the lives of their next of kin that they are losing
it’s only their lives and the lives of their next of kin that they are losing
it’s alright ’cause the historical pattern has shown
how the economical cycle tends to revolve
in a round of decades three stages stand out in a loop
a slump and war then peel back to square one and back for more
bigger slump and bigger wars and a smaller recovery
huger slump and greater wars and a shallower recovery
don’t worry be happy things will get better naturally
don’t worry shut up sit down go with it and be happy
dum, dum, dum, de dum dum, de duh de duh de dum dum dum… ah ah
dum, dum, dum, de dum dum, de duh de duh de dum dum dum… ah ah

THE DIALOGUE IN HUNGER

I like HUNGER (2008, Steve McQueen) very much. But some of my Thai friends and I don’t understand the dialogue in the middle of the film. Our English listening ability is not that good. Fortunately, May Adadol Ingawanij has transcribed the dialogue for us. I think this dialogue transcription may be useful for others, too.

—————————————————
Scene with Bobby Sands and priest. Priest comes in:

BS: You can sit down any time you like.

P: Priest etiquette. Shall I come over to you here.

BS: Best to hover over at the door.

P: You learnt that in your first week at the seminary, boy. Cig?

BS: Come on.

P: Bit of a break from smoking the bible, hey? Have you worked out which book is the best smoke?

BS: We only go for ‘lamentations.’

P: Nice room, very clean.

BS: Where is it you’re from again, Don?

P: Born you mean? PUNNING

BS: I remember a homily you did at mass one time.

P: Oh, were you listening to it.

BS: There are men who hold you in high esteem.

P: Oh, I can feel a dig coming on.

BS: You’re very quick, right. Nah, you’re respected you know that. I like those stories you tell about the countryside.

P: A childhood of poaching, robbing apples, stampeding cattles.

BS: An education for a priest?

P: Priest working in West Belfast it is.

BS: Stampeding comes in handy down the Falls Road [FRONTLINE BETWEEN CATHOLIC AND PROTESTANT COMMUNITIES] You miss it though?

P: What?

BS: Countryside

P: Nice to get home to see my wee brother every month or so. But yes I miss the clean air, the space, all that.

BS: Feels closer to who you are?

P: Ay, it is. No question. Something like a fish out of water working in a big city like West Belfast, but it’s a job, isn’t it. You stop looking at your surroundings quick enough when you figure your business is the business of the soul.

BS: Business of the soul

P: Ah, you know what I mean.

BS: Learnt that in seminary too?

P: Ay, and you can use that free of charge. I suppose what I’m saying is, you get on. Kilray [WHERE HE’S FROM] can wait till I’m an old man.

BS: Too many STH to be saved in Belfast anyway.

P: Ay.

BS: You’ll get your reward in heaven.

P: And I’ll be thankful, if there’s wine involved.

BS: So what’s your wee brother doing back home?

P: He’s a parish priest. He’s a sneaky wee bastard, you know the sort.

BS: He still goes poaching?

P: Poaching jobs, and he’s younger than me by 8 years. As a cleric I hold a place beside Kilray, working my ass off. House calls to the elderly, mobile confessions

BS: The glamorous stuff

P: Oh ay. Position comes up at Kilray and I’m passed over for some reason, no particular reason. So about five years later position again comes up back home at Kilray and my brother Michael waltzes right into it.

BS: Fuck

P: He’s been made a parish priest at 28.

BS: More spiritual maybe. Less lippy than you.

P: He worked the bishop, he’s a golfer. He’s a pushy little twerp that’s what he is.

BS: At least you’re not bitter.

P: Oh no I couldn’t be that, no.

BS: Parish priest at 28, fantastic.

P: Hmm, he’s got two cars. And the house he has is massive. He’s got a maid, and a cook, and I’m stuck with a two up two down [HOUSE TYPE] with a fat man who goes on and on about Gallic football. Can we stop talking about him

BS: Jesus you’re the one who’s talking.

P: How’s the smoke going?

BS: Grand

P: Filty habit, disgusting.

BS: Lovely though

P: Ay, praise the lord.

BS: 28 my god.

P: Oh stop it. So what happened to your eye Bobby?

BS: What?

P: Did you have a dig at yourself? Your eye

BS: Difference of opinion

P: How’s the other fella?

BS: A lot worse, believe me.

P: So what did you call me here for?

BS: Is that the idle banter over with?

P: Priest etiquette, start with the small talk.

BS: I’m learning a lot about the priesthood though

P: Oh you’d make a good priest. Good talker, man of principle, leader of men.

BS: Political theorist

P: The church loves a reformed crook

BS: I always felt that thief next to Jesus got off lightly

P: Ah but he recognised his sins

BS: Did he though?

P: Ay, said as much

BS: When you’re hung from a cross you don’t say anything. Jesus offers him a place next to his daddy in a place called paradise. You’re always gonna put your hand up and have a piece of that

P: Ay, even when it’s nailed to a cross

BS: Jesus Christ that’s sacrilegious

P: No, no, he was a dirty thief. So what did you want to tell me? Where are you at? Been driven mad by that governer yet?

BS: You see this negotiating lark? It’s been a sideshow.

P: But you understand why you need to do it?

BS: Because we’re no longer good propaganda

P: According to who? The leadership?

BS: Time’s come. Decision had to be made.

P: You think that’s what the leadership think?

BS: Maybe, I don’t know.

P: You’re a bit paranoid Bobby.

BS: 10,000 people marched for the hunger strikers last october, right? International pressure on the Brits and all that.

P: Busy time

BS: Even the pope’s having a say, getting involved. The whole world trying to get Maggie Thatcher to back down, give us our demands. But all came to nothing. Hunger strike failed, we’re on the frontline. We created the protest, it’s our responsibility. Leadership have been very clear to me, Don. Four and a half years of the no wash protest as much as it’s has highlighted republicanism to some extent. It’s also distracted from the wider development of the organisation.

P: As your needs are specific needs.

BS: Of course they are. Some woman bringing up 3 children in West Belfast shouldn’t care about civilian type clothing or whatever they’re calling these clown outfits. Honest to god Don, we were promised our own clothes. It’s childish skullduggery.

P: So the leadership have had enough of you

BS: In an ideal world we’d be fight our battles independently. But we’re tied. Nothing’s changing here, nothing’s moved on. The leadership are stuck with us until there’s some realistic chance of moving toward political status. That’s the hard truth of it. You see to get me to negotiating with these lying reneging monkies when there’s nothing on the table, it’s just pure crap. I’m not going to be marched into this governor’s office and get caught up in some mindless pointless dialogue with that pompous bastard.

P: He’s a big fan of yours

BS: Thick as two short planks. Can you believe they made him governer though, it’s a bloody insult to humanity

P: Where do you get your energy from?

BS: I was a cross country runner when I was a boy

P: Could have guessed it, big engine on you. Cross country runner, explains a lot about you Bobby.

B: …that’s the whole country thing for me. They’d have to hold me back at the finishing line or I’ll keep on and on. Scrappers and mongrels from the city, frightened of cattles and all. Think you could get milk and burgers from those monsters, jesus christ. Next time round I’ll be born in a countryside guaranteed. Wild life, birds, paradise.

P: Ay, and you could learn to relax too.

B: Maybe, you never know, never tried it before. We’re starting a hunger strike on the first of march. That’s why you’re here, that’s what I’m telling you.

P: Ay, I heard that. Does your family know?

B: I got word out to them, ay. Got a visit in two weeks’ time, we’ll talk then.

P: How do you think they’ll take it?

B: What do you think Don?

P: You’re their wee boy….So what makes it different from the last time?

B: Last time the strikes were flawed. It became emotional. Seven men started at the same time. They all got weak, they couldn’t let the weakest one die. It left us susceptible to being conned by the Brits, and that’s exactly what we were, conned. This time out the men will start consecutively two weeks apart, somebody dies, they’ll be replaced. There’s no shortage of us, 75 men have put their names forward

P: For christ’s sake

B: The announcement’s being made today

P: So what makes this protest different is that you’re set to die, Bobby?

B: May well come to that

P: You start a hunger strike to protest for something you believe in. You don’t start already determined to die, or am I missing something here?

B: It’s in their hands, our message is clear, the same as our determination.

P: So it will take a couple of deaths do you think, maybe five or six, but there are 75 of you.

B: It won’t come to that

P: Alright maybe the Brits will buckle after twenty or so, but why should you care cos you’re already dead, right? Have you thought about what you’re going to be putting these boys through? I mean putting aside what’s going to happen to these poor men’s families. You’re going head to head with a British government that clearly despises republicanism, who are unshakable, who can easily live with the deaths of what they call terrorists. And the stakes are much higher this time.

B: I know that.

P: And if you’re not even willing to negotiate, you’re looking for them to capitulate, is that it?

B: Right

P: So failure means many dead men, families torn apart, and the whole republican movement demoralised

B: Ay, worst case scenario might well mean all that. But short term. Out of the ashes..

P: come on

B: ..guaranteed there’ll be a new generation of men and women, even more resilient, more determined

P: Look who you’re talking to

B: There’s a war going on, I thought you might understand. You’re talking like a foreigner

P: You’re talking to me like I’m a foreigner. You think I don’t know Northern Ireland, I live here man.

B: Then support us.
P: I supported the first hunger strike on the basis that it was a protest, not some predesigned to die, balk at negotiation other than complete surrender from Thatcher. That’s ridiculous Bobby, it’s destructive.

B: What’s been happening here the past four years, the brutality, humiliation, all our basic human rights taken from us. All of this has to come to an end

P: Through talking

B: So what, we take their offer put their uniform on? Cos the last four years have been nothing. We could do that Don, or we could behave like the army that we proclaim to be and lay down our lives for our comrades.

P: Is there not even a small part of you that’s hoping for a breakthrough? That could find you negotiating again

B: That won’t happen.

P: Right, forget about that. I want to know if your intent is just to commit suicide here.

B: You want me to argue about the morality of what I’m about to do and whether it’s suicide or not? For one you’re calling it suicide, I’m calling it murder. That’s another wee difference between us two. We’re both catholic men, both republicans. But while you were poaching salmon in lovely Kilray we were being burnt out of our house in STH. Similar men in many ways, Don, but life and experience have focused our beliefs differently, you understand me?

P: I understand

B: I have my belief, and in all its simplicity that is the most powerful thing.

P: So what is your statement by dying? Just highlighting British intransigence, so fucking what. The whole world knows what the Brits are like.

B: Good

P: It is good, and it’s nothing to do with you. The Brits have been fucking everything up for centuries.

B: I can feel your hatred Don.

P: You’re looking for martyrdom?

B: No

P: You sure? Cos I’ve heard you eulogising, Wolf Tone, MacSwinney, all them men. Can’t help thinking you’re writing your name large in them history books.

B: Cos you think that matters for me

P: Oh ay, I know it does.

B: Well you’re wrong.

P: You see you’re soldiers, it’s all about the freedom, but you got no appreciation of a life Bobby. You no longer know what a life is, you men. Four years living in these conditions, no one expects you to be normal. There’s nothing normal about you. Right now the republican movement has talked itself into a corner. You IRA are standing right behind it looking into that corner. All that history, all them dead men and women, you’re still saying nothing. When your answer is to kill everything you’ve blinded yourself, and you’re scared to stop it. Afraid of living, afraid of talking, peace. So what would Ulster be if it wasn’t turning itself to shit? And this situation here, that the republican movement is in the hands of you men who have lost all sense of reality. You think your head’s all right? Locked up in here 24 hours a day in piss and shit. And you are making decisions that could see so many men die. Build a statue to Bobby Sands. You’re joking. Freedom fighter? They’re the men and women working out there in the community. And that was you, once upon a time. Am I right? All that work you did in Twin Brook. That’s where we need you Bobby, and you know I’m right.

B: That I’m deluded. You want me to answer that?

P: They’re beating you Bobby. You’re playing into their hands.

B: The strategy’s in place.

P: Then stop it.

B: You don’t understand a thing.

P: You’re in no shape to make this call.

B: It’s done. It won’t be stopped.

P: Then fuck it, life must mean nothing to you.

B: God’s gonna punish me.

P: Well if not just for the suicide, then he’d have to punish you for the stupidity.

B: Ay, and you for your arrogance. Cos my life is a real life, not some theological exercise, some religious trip that’s got fuck all to do with living. Jesus christ had a backbone. The same as them disciples, every disciple since. You’re just jumping in and out of the rhetoric, and deadend semantics. You need the revolutionary, you need the cultural political soldiers to give life a pulse, to give life a direction

P: That’s just stupid talk, you’re deluded

B: Ay, so you say

P: Yeah and what’s your wee son gonna say?

B: FuckOff

P: Doesn’t that interest you?

B: Think you can attack me with sentiment? Typical priest

P: What does your heart say Bobby?

B: I thought you had me all figured out Don?

P: What’s it saying? Tell me

B: My life means everything to me. Freedom means everything. I know you don’t mean to mock me, Don, so I’ll let all that pass. This is one of these times when we’ve come to pause, it’s time to keep your belief pure. I believe that a united Ireland is right and just. Maybe it’s impossible for a man like you to understand. But having a respect for my life, a desire for freedom, and an unyielding love for that belief means I can see past any doubts I may have. Putting my life on the line is not just the only thing I can do, Don. It’s the right thing.

P: This is why you called me here. You needed a sounding board, not a hundred percent sure of yourself. Been doubting yourself maybe.

B: Ay, we’re only human

P: And I’ve made it clear for you there.

B: Man of guidance, Don, business of the soul…Have you been to STH in Donegal? I went there when I was 12. Wee crossed country race for the boys, and we’re all on the back of the minibus heading for Derry one morning. This is big time, this is like international aethletics for us cos we’re racing the big boys in the south. And we have this thing to do Belfast pride. Three of the boys were Prods [protestants] and the rest of us were catholics. Community event. I suppose people in the south think this is great stuff, this wee team from Belfast and all that patronising shit. Anyway, we went through the border, the boys singing pop tunes and all. I’m just in the back of the bus looking out of the window. We’re going through them mountains, you know where mount STH is? A beautiful sight Don. Donegal must be the most beautiful place in Ireland I reckon.

P: Ay

B: Anyway we arrive at STH, what a place. And it’s hopping with about 200 boys in there and they’re getting into their gear and limbering up. The whole event is run by Christian brothers, clipping young fellas round the ears and basically trying to maintain some order. Our team goes out for a wee jog, stretch out the legs, we’re surrounded by these fields of Barley where there’s a stream and woods running through it. Naturally us Belfast boys have to go check them out, woods and stream like the Amazon to us. And we come across these young fellas from Cork. And there’s banter about our accent. They could barely talk, we couldn’t understand a word they were saying. You get the idea they’re lording over us a bit. We’re running along and we come up with this idea to go down the stream and check it out for fish. So we’re down by the stream, there’s half a foot of water in there. Little silver fish but nothing substantial. So one of their boys calls us down. Lying in the water is a wee foal, four five days old, he’s all skin and bone, grey colour, and he’s got flecks of blood on his coat cos he’s cut himself sharply on them rocks. We were just standing over him and you can see his back leg snapped. He’s breathing, he’s alive, just about. So this big conversation gets started up between the boys who suddenly make themselves the leaders, deliberating what we should do. Someone said drop a rock on his head. But I’m looking in their faces and I can see they’re either scared stiff or clueless. It’s all bravado. And this foal on the ground, in real pain, all this chitchat going on, going nowhere. Next thing the priest sees us, sees the foal, tells us not to move we’re done for. We’re really done for. A group of boys will always get the blame for hurting a foal. Group of Belfast boys will take a hammering for sure. So it’s clear to me in a instant, and I’m down on my knees, and I take the foal’s head in my hands and I put it under water. He’s thrashing around a bit at the start so I press down harder until he’s drowned. Priest arrives, Don. He’s dragging me by the hair through the woods, promising me a proper hiding. But I knew I did the right thing by that wee foal. And I could take the punishment for all our boys. I had the respect of them other boys now, and I knew that. I’m clear of the reasons Don. I’m clear of the repercussions. But I will act, and I will not stand by and do nothing.

P: [PAUSES, GRABS CIGARETTES]

B: You can leave them there if you like. Don’t want me rolling up the Letter of St John do you?

P: Wouldn’t want that on my conscience, no. I don’t think I’m going to see you again, Bobby.

B: There’s no need Don.

Thanks to May Adadol for this transcription.